If you have read other articles in my blog, by now you know that I observe people and their ways. Now, I was born and raised into an Indian family – and on a scale of mocha to coconut, my family falls in the middle. Now, why I have to say this is, since we have migrations happening for decades, and little Indian kids routinely growing up in other countries, there is a necessity to telepathically establish one’s “brown-ness” upfront, when we meet other brown people. Why I say “brown-ness” instead of “Indian-ness” is because anyone who is from the Indian subcontinent, who don’t actually identify as Indian take offence at being called “Indian”. So on a scale of mocha (very brown) to coconut (brown on the outside, white on the inside), my family arguably falls in the middle. To begin with, we were a part of the initial migrants, who were taken to another British colony for work during the British rule, so although we are effectively Indian in all our ways, we are dual citizens of India and another country (Overseas Citizens of India).
My grandparents spoke English – quite fluently, I might add, because my grandfather on my mother’s side - I would have called him “Thatha” if he hadn’t prematurely died of a heart attack – routinely wrote poems and had his own, very impressive collection of books, including the complete works of Shakespeare, written in the form of a play (I think, because I didn’t have the patience to get through it before his books were auctioned off at one point). He was well educated for his time, and worked as an Accountant, in a then well-established international organization (an offshore British company located where we lived). He also spoke 3 languages fluently, which was often two more than the average person of his time.
So, naturally, my grandmother spoke English, and my mother and her siblings too. On my father’s side, my grandfather worked for a British employer during the British rule, and he spoke English passably well too, even if he wasn’t as well read or as educated as Thatha was. My father, however, broke the mould in his family, and went ahead and got qualified as an Accountant from a British establishment too, which meant that if he didn’t speak English well to begin with, he certainly did after that.
Now, often, speaking a ‘foreign’ language cannot be complete without some amount of a cultural exchange happening. The more fluent you are, the more of an influence this other culture would have on you. So, the fact that I spoke English as a first language, alongside, my mother tongue meant that I was a unique blend of these two cultures, French, which I learnt for a while, when my parents and I lived in the Seychelles, and at school as a second language, and then the panoply of Indian languages I was exposed to during my time spent in 2 different metropolitan cities in India. If you don’t know this about India already, each state in India is culturally unique, with its own language, attire, cultural practices, etc. – so this was probably the most enriching experience of my life, where I got to reconnect with my roots, and be immersed in a plethora of different languages and cultures in a modern context, as I grew up with the Internet – so I actually saw globalization happening as I grew – I was a part of it, even.
So when I was growing up, I have been fortunate to attend educational institutions where a number of nationalities were represented, and I feel like I got valuable insight into their ways of thinking and doing things – learned from each one, and I feel richer for having known these wonderful people. As a result, I have been raised to constantly seek out variety in life – I like to involve myself in a number of different things, and to always find something new to learn. This also exposed me to a larger subset of people from a number of different backgrounds, and but this time, once I outgrew the ‘studenthood’ phase, it was a different – this time, another dimension was added to the variety – educational backgrounds and overall life experience. So, I can safely say that I have at least met and spoken to a mixed bag of roughly a thousand to two thousand people, if not a little more.
Now if you’re like me, raised in a country outside Europe, Australia or the US, you are raised to think that “The White Man” as they are called, has it all figured out, that they were above gossip, they always knew the right things to say, they were somehow, far more civilized and above the rest of the world. Weirdly, we are also fed with contrasting views that somehow look down on their “Lack of Culture” (it’s the best way I can sum up the things that are said). Of course media coloured my perceptions as well, so I wasn’t all that ignorant either, but I think it’s safe to say that my idea of what the first world looked like was quite different from what I actually saw, felt and experienced when I moved to Australia a few years ago. I was very surprised with what I saw. There was of course, the wonders of the first world – convenience was mainly it, but the rat race was far less intense and life-or-death than what I was used to. I loved it, and I was nostalgic for my India at the same time.
I was very fortunate to meet people from different walks of life in Australia as well, and I saw that, like everywhere else, you get all sorts of people. You get people who gossip, people who don’t gossip, friendly people, unfriendly people, civilized people, uncivilized people - just every kind of person. There are obviously differences in how different countries deal with disadvantaged people and the actual circumstances in the lives of different people, but people and their personalities, I think, would broadly stay the same everywhere you go.
I have to say, though, that my experience in Australia has been great in that I fully appreciate the kindness in people, and their willingness to help the next person, particularly in their time of need. It is something that really gives me hope for the world. Like I said – a very different rat race - people are very busy, but extremely family oriented - involved parents, loving families, who obviously may have their fights, but overall, they seem to function as a unit. Each individual has the chance to shine, if they chose to – the system is designed to help you at every step, which is quite the opposite in countries like India, where, as a country, there quite literally are way too many mouths to feed, so the struggle is REAL.
My point of writing this blog post, was, to give you context - my views as to why I think that people are people, wherever you go. As a result of recent events, in particular, I find myself finding patterns in every group of friends and I see, that you have all the usual suspects – the nosy one, the needy one, the selfish one, the weird one, the gossipy one, the one who can’t grow up, the mother, the Mother Teresa, the model, the selfie king/queen, the cute and cuddly one, the old soul, the smart one, the dumb one – ha ha – I sound like a very judgemental person from that sentence, but I’m aware that some of those things describe me as well (and they’re not the good ones haha). Well, I’m not judgemental, but I find that I need to make smart choices about who to actually be close to, and who not to – because I do value quality over quantity, and I treat my close friends like family. It goes without saying that this process of elimination also shows me who to watch out for, and who to avoid, which I find is very important to know. Anyway, I’m certainly not about to be insincere to people who are sincere to me and vice versa, so I’m generally upfront about how I feel about people, and I’m mostly with them as they are with me.
So, back to my point, people are people, there may be some differences based on their individual circumstances, but broadly, people are the same. In every society, you will find wonderful people, and you will find truly horrible people, and then, there’s everything in between. Nationality, race, cast, creed – none of this matters, when it gets down to it. People are people, and there’s no escaping that reality, which may have its negative sides, but also, it means that there is still such good in people, just that it’s at different depths. With some people, it’s bubbling at the surface, and with others, not so much, and also, it is important to keep in mind, that, no matter how good a person can be, they will have their faults, and their quirks. I find it useful to observe and pick up on them – just to be aware of them. It may come as no surprise to you that I don’t like surprises, and God knows that I have been let down far too many times to not wonder, from the start, where each person’s cracks may be – just to protect myself against any potential hurt. When I go in with my eyes open, I know exactly when to check out, before any kind of relationship hits dire straits, and in some cases, I identify a situation where I can stand by my friend, and in the process, strengthen my friendship with them, because their crazy may match my crazy (straight outta Deadpool’s mouth - lol).
So there it is – now you know what I meant, and my job here is done.
My grandparents spoke English – quite fluently, I might add, because my grandfather on my mother’s side - I would have called him “Thatha” if he hadn’t prematurely died of a heart attack – routinely wrote poems and had his own, very impressive collection of books, including the complete works of Shakespeare, written in the form of a play (I think, because I didn’t have the patience to get through it before his books were auctioned off at one point). He was well educated for his time, and worked as an Accountant, in a then well-established international organization (an offshore British company located where we lived). He also spoke 3 languages fluently, which was often two more than the average person of his time.
So, naturally, my grandmother spoke English, and my mother and her siblings too. On my father’s side, my grandfather worked for a British employer during the British rule, and he spoke English passably well too, even if he wasn’t as well read or as educated as Thatha was. My father, however, broke the mould in his family, and went ahead and got qualified as an Accountant from a British establishment too, which meant that if he didn’t speak English well to begin with, he certainly did after that.
Now, often, speaking a ‘foreign’ language cannot be complete without some amount of a cultural exchange happening. The more fluent you are, the more of an influence this other culture would have on you. So, the fact that I spoke English as a first language, alongside, my mother tongue meant that I was a unique blend of these two cultures, French, which I learnt for a while, when my parents and I lived in the Seychelles, and at school as a second language, and then the panoply of Indian languages I was exposed to during my time spent in 2 different metropolitan cities in India. If you don’t know this about India already, each state in India is culturally unique, with its own language, attire, cultural practices, etc. – so this was probably the most enriching experience of my life, where I got to reconnect with my roots, and be immersed in a plethora of different languages and cultures in a modern context, as I grew up with the Internet – so I actually saw globalization happening as I grew – I was a part of it, even.
So when I was growing up, I have been fortunate to attend educational institutions where a number of nationalities were represented, and I feel like I got valuable insight into their ways of thinking and doing things – learned from each one, and I feel richer for having known these wonderful people. As a result, I have been raised to constantly seek out variety in life – I like to involve myself in a number of different things, and to always find something new to learn. This also exposed me to a larger subset of people from a number of different backgrounds, and but this time, once I outgrew the ‘studenthood’ phase, it was a different – this time, another dimension was added to the variety – educational backgrounds and overall life experience. So, I can safely say that I have at least met and spoken to a mixed bag of roughly a thousand to two thousand people, if not a little more.
Now if you’re like me, raised in a country outside Europe, Australia or the US, you are raised to think that “The White Man” as they are called, has it all figured out, that they were above gossip, they always knew the right things to say, they were somehow, far more civilized and above the rest of the world. Weirdly, we are also fed with contrasting views that somehow look down on their “Lack of Culture” (it’s the best way I can sum up the things that are said). Of course media coloured my perceptions as well, so I wasn’t all that ignorant either, but I think it’s safe to say that my idea of what the first world looked like was quite different from what I actually saw, felt and experienced when I moved to Australia a few years ago. I was very surprised with what I saw. There was of course, the wonders of the first world – convenience was mainly it, but the rat race was far less intense and life-or-death than what I was used to. I loved it, and I was nostalgic for my India at the same time.
I was very fortunate to meet people from different walks of life in Australia as well, and I saw that, like everywhere else, you get all sorts of people. You get people who gossip, people who don’t gossip, friendly people, unfriendly people, civilized people, uncivilized people - just every kind of person. There are obviously differences in how different countries deal with disadvantaged people and the actual circumstances in the lives of different people, but people and their personalities, I think, would broadly stay the same everywhere you go.
I have to say, though, that my experience in Australia has been great in that I fully appreciate the kindness in people, and their willingness to help the next person, particularly in their time of need. It is something that really gives me hope for the world. Like I said – a very different rat race - people are very busy, but extremely family oriented - involved parents, loving families, who obviously may have their fights, but overall, they seem to function as a unit. Each individual has the chance to shine, if they chose to – the system is designed to help you at every step, which is quite the opposite in countries like India, where, as a country, there quite literally are way too many mouths to feed, so the struggle is REAL.
My point of writing this blog post, was, to give you context - my views as to why I think that people are people, wherever you go. As a result of recent events, in particular, I find myself finding patterns in every group of friends and I see, that you have all the usual suspects – the nosy one, the needy one, the selfish one, the weird one, the gossipy one, the one who can’t grow up, the mother, the Mother Teresa, the model, the selfie king/queen, the cute and cuddly one, the old soul, the smart one, the dumb one – ha ha – I sound like a very judgemental person from that sentence, but I’m aware that some of those things describe me as well (and they’re not the good ones haha). Well, I’m not judgemental, but I find that I need to make smart choices about who to actually be close to, and who not to – because I do value quality over quantity, and I treat my close friends like family. It goes without saying that this process of elimination also shows me who to watch out for, and who to avoid, which I find is very important to know. Anyway, I’m certainly not about to be insincere to people who are sincere to me and vice versa, so I’m generally upfront about how I feel about people, and I’m mostly with them as they are with me.
So, back to my point, people are people, there may be some differences based on their individual circumstances, but broadly, people are the same. In every society, you will find wonderful people, and you will find truly horrible people, and then, there’s everything in between. Nationality, race, cast, creed – none of this matters, when it gets down to it. People are people, and there’s no escaping that reality, which may have its negative sides, but also, it means that there is still such good in people, just that it’s at different depths. With some people, it’s bubbling at the surface, and with others, not so much, and also, it is important to keep in mind, that, no matter how good a person can be, they will have their faults, and their quirks. I find it useful to observe and pick up on them – just to be aware of them. It may come as no surprise to you that I don’t like surprises, and God knows that I have been let down far too many times to not wonder, from the start, where each person’s cracks may be – just to protect myself against any potential hurt. When I go in with my eyes open, I know exactly when to check out, before any kind of relationship hits dire straits, and in some cases, I identify a situation where I can stand by my friend, and in the process, strengthen my friendship with them, because their crazy may match my crazy (straight outta Deadpool’s mouth - lol).
So there it is – now you know what I meant, and my job here is done.
